“Out of My Mind”

“Out of My Mind”
Sometimes I’d rather squiggle out lines that speak my mind.
I’d rather make a mess that do my best.
Caught somewhere in between, I’d rather kick and scream than try to understand what it all means.
I’d much rather say, “Fuck it” than search for silver linings in an empty bucket. I’d rather say, “I quit” than pretend to give a shit.
For all I know there may never be a pot of gold on the other end of the rainbow.
I’d rather get drunk and high than live an honest life.
I’d rather stick my middle finger to the sky than kick a quarter to a homeless guy.
Maybe I could just stuff my face and let my body go to waste and still end up in the same old place.
My mind’s not all giggles and sunshine.
It’s not filtered through white light, not always sublime.
Then my heart it screams, “Wake up!” and I can’t help but hear it.
I take a deep breath, and I thank the Spirit.
I remember that I’m blessed to have this life even though it’s a struggle trying to live it right.
I never know if it’ll all pay off –
Trading in my idea of sin so I can clean my thoughts or maybe right my wrongs.
They say patience is a virtue,
But it’s just another word when your thoughts are trying to hurt you.
But if I can find it deep inside and simply let it be my guide,
Then the mind will surely turn in time for me to rest in peace before the afterlife.
It’s a bipolar Nature –
It’s pleasure with pain on the flipside, but the coin is the same.
Gotta learn to ride the waves or the riptide is sure to take me away.
Gotta learn to let each slip be a part of the dance so I can fall back in rhythm and just keep it relaxed.
Knowing perfection is a construct that gets made in the mind,
But clear perception is the way to let its chokehold unwind.
Bet you probably think I’m pretty crazy and that I’ve lost it by now,
But I just felt like writing something and these are the words that came out.
Hahah I laugh at my mind sometimes <3

7 Comments

  1. Jesse Russell says:

    Moral of the story.. don’t take your thoughts (or your mind) too seriously! Or any of this experience.. it is to be enjoyed not over-analyzed 🙂

    1. Kim Russell says:

      Analysis leads to paralysis, so to speak.

  2. Cody Starsoul says:

    this resonates 111%..today esp..

    1. Jesse Russell says:

      Had to let that vibe out and onto paper at least.. feel like a new person now!

  3. Rob Russell says:

    Crazy journey these lives we lead. Not so much the distance or destination, it’s the ride!

    1. Jesse Russell says:

      Quite a roller-coaster it can be! I’ve always enjoyed a good thrill ride I must admit

  4. Karen Konarski says:

    It’s getting to sad for me

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